and so it is, just like you said

With one phone call, my whole world changed and only the day before I was in a tutu smoking a cigarette on a balcony at an after-after party. Since then, I've discovered what it really means to love, to fight for what I want and to pursue my greatest fears with fervor and passion. I gained a friendship that I thought would last a lifetime, to loose it in a blink of an eye; I don't have a bed to call my own and I love this; I read a book that changed the way I perceive the world and fell madly in love with a French man with the bluest eyes I've ever seen.

Every day I ask myself, what am I doing today to move forward. I think of my father often, he's misunderstood on so many levels and yet revered by so many, as he should be. I owe to him my inner voice that keeps saying, "The Buddha points to the moon, and the student looks at the finger".

I stumble and fall a lot, sometimes I don't pick myself up until a friend helps me; and I can't stop believing everything is perfect just as it is, no matter how I perceive the current moment. I've had some painful moments and you know it hurts when that ball in your throat swells up and the eyes fill with tears... and your in the grocery store buying wine.

I'm a photographer and last night goes down in the books as I listened to my friend Jesse recite spoken word as we huddled in the bathroom late Saturday night at a friends house. He and I bubbled with excitement about how we are going to create these amazing images together in the Moore Hotel. I paced and pranced back and forth - throwing my arms around - talking about my ideas, as if I were going to die within the hour.... and I felt.. so... alive.

".... design a whole world nobody understands, I felt myself alive, in the palm of your hand, as long as we are flying, this world ain't got no end" Paul & Fritz Kalkbrenner